When I was growing up, I used to complain to my parents about not having any friends – it was partly true, because I wasn’t a very friendly person. Nevertheless, my parents would always encourage me that I had lots of friends & they were always very affirming on this topic. Here are some other pearls of wisdom they taught me in relation to friendships:
- diversity is good – its good to have lots of different kinds of friends: smart, funny, healthy, beautiful, chubby, witty, deep, seasonal, insightful, superficial, . . . . . Diversity is the spice of life!
- in order to have friends, we must be friendly: smile, be forgiving, generous, seeking to understand
- be more concerned about being interested rather than interesting: listening can be a timeless gift
- a friendship isn’t merely about what you can get out of the relationship, but also what you can give
- don’t be disappointed because someone is unable to give something you want in a friendship – maybe they don’t have that skill set or ability, just like you also have some shortcomings
- give the benefit of the doubt: don’t assign malicious intent
- no one person can be your everything in life – this expectation is unhealthy & ultimately idolatrous
- be the friend you would like to have 🙂
- forgive, forgive, forgive & be prepared to continue forgiving
I love this: “listening can be a timeless gift.”
I agree, be the friend to others, you are looking for.